Of Pirates Past

In which we discuss the events that led up to the conception of the Captain Baker.

As a boy, I never found myself fascinated by pirates.  I did have a pirate-themed 6th birthday party (with a grand treasure hunt, orchestrated by my parents) and I did love Muppet Treasure Island (mostly due to the wonderful portrayal of Silver by Tim Curry).  But pirates, generally, seemed too violent to admire and too distant (growing up in the desert) to sympathize with.

However, in 2003 my good friend Mr. Shae encouraged me to celebrate "International Talk Like A Pirate Day".  It was a fun idea and we spend our lunch break confusing people with our bad pirate jargon but we lacked the confidence to carry our celebration into the classroom.  2004 was much the same.  In college, without my first mate, I observed the holiday by talking to myself in a nautical voice but couldn't muster the courage to indoctrinate anyone else.

Fortunately, in 2012, a few new friends pointed out that Krispy Kreme Doughnuts was celebrating "Talk Like a Pirate Day" by giving a free doughnut to anyone who talked like a pirate and a free dozen to anyone who looked like a pirate.  A quick trip to the thrift store netted a polo shirt, a pair of shorts, and a vest which, distressed with a belt sander, looked piratical enough.  We hit up 2 different doughnut shops, scoring 10 dozen doughnuts that day.  I later dropped my share of the booty off at my wife's classroom, convincing all the students that I was, in fact, a real pirate.

In 2013 we gathered again (with some changed to the crew) and hit up 3 Krispy Kreme shops and also 3 Long John Silver's (who offered a free piece of fish to anyone talking like a pirate that year).  This was enough to convince me that I really enjoyed the spirit of the holiday (silly costumes, free food, and good times) so I decided that my wife and I should invest the time to make good costumes for halloween 2014 that would also facilitate "Talk Like a Pirate" celebrations for years to come.